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There is nothing wrong with your breakdown

20 October 2015, 14:04Saffiya Ismail

No matter how strong we are, no one can deny that life certainly can test our patience, our limits and our tolerance levels.

Sometimes it all seems too much and we fall into a black abyss of negativity. Most times we just feel completely broken. It’s not that we are weak or overly sensitive, but sometimes when you go through the tough times, every possible question comes to mind. You analyse everything, your internal settings get stretched. It feels and seems as the divine is against you.
Maybe the Divine is actually telling you to a step back. Maybe it’s time to let those feelings come to the surface. We all feel broken from time to time. Yes life does throw up those heart-breaking experiences; we go through fear and tragedy. However we get through somehow.

I lost my one and only brother-in-law. All it took was 4 days, from the time he went into hospital to the time of his death. This was just so unbelievable, one minute, there’s a husband, a father, a brother, family member, work colleague, and then he’s gone.

We sit back and wonder how, why. The scale and timeline of such a loss is inexplicable. It leaves one broken.

These are life lessons. They remind us of the fragility of life. Those left behind will eventually become stronger, with time and support. BUT right now we are all broken. We can never question our Creator, ‘to him we belong, and to him we shall return’.

Whatever we go through in life, that brokenness is a gift. I know it’s hard to see it as that. It’s a gift of brokenness which helps us to grow as a person.

If you didn’t become broken from time to time, there would be no place for the light to enter your soul. It definitely takes a stab to your heart, its heart wrenching and when we go through something like this we pull out the magnifying glass and scrutinize why us, why now. We just cannot see any good in it.

Yet, all which we go through is a transformation of our soul. If we only had awesome amazing moments, no grief and sadness, how would light enter us, how would we grown how would we know our true strength and resilience.

Whether its death, heartbreak, a marriage ending, parent – children issues, the list goes on and on. If you are expecting an easy ride in life, then think again.

We all are going to have life-changing experiences, things are going to tear you apart, break your heart, shock you to the very core of you, hurt like a b@#$#@, but this is only to help you rebuild you into a better version of yourself.  Negativity is bound to engulf every one of us at some time. For some it’s just for a period; others longer. Why should we feel bad for feelings and emotions, you are human after all. So if we are going through something in life which warrants a strong reaction, whether its crying, screaming, falling to our knees, and just accepting the waves of emotion that come over us.

Do it, feel it, express it. Even the freaking Kardashians cry over chipped manicures, why should you not scream, when your life partner decides “nope, he's not happy and he wants to move on”, Scream, cry, break down, its fine.

We concern ourselves with “what people will say” or will they think I am too sensitive. Really that is high on your agenda at this point!

Who cares how people will react to you crying or showing raw emotions. Fighting off the inevitable will only delay your breakdown, cause health and emotional issues.  

During hard times in life, we often forget what we even want from life in the first place. We all came here to love with all of our hearts, and we need to increase our connection with our Creator.

When you feel broken, one needs to turn to the one who never fails you or to whatever you believe in. When you down on bended knees, this actually give your purpose in life more depth.

Emotions and feeling change, once this bad patch is over, you will smile again. This is life, from the time we are born we have cried, and this ride we call LIFE, has an expiry date. Feel what you want to feel, deal with what you have too, take time out – cry, shout, break a cup or two, but please don’t think you are superman or superwoman, you are allowed to fall down. All you need to remember is that at some point you will need to get up.


We take it so seriously, you don’t get out of this life alive I assure you.

Even the hardships and despair, come because you are needed to go through this experience for a reason, when you  do look back on your life, you will thank your brokenness just as much as your happiness for this is what life is about, it’s your chosen journey.

Check out Saffiya's blog and follow her on Twitter.

- Woman24


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