Create Profile

Creating your profile will enable you to submit photos and stories to get published on News24.

Please provide a username for your profile page:

This username must be unique, cannot be edited and will be used in the URL to your profile page across the entire 24.com network.

Facebook Sign-In

Hi News addict,

Join the News24 Community to be involved in breaking the news.

Log in with Facebook to comment and personalise news, weather and listings.


How "faking it" can change your life

19 February 2016, 07:39Marisa Crous

When I was in grade 8 I found myself in a situation where I had to read out loud in class. I turned beet red and struggled the entire way through. My nerves were shot. Bad memories of grade 1 came flooding back. I was a very bad reader who took audible breaths every time I spotted even a hint of a comma.

From that embarrassing day in grade 8, I dreaded the teacher calling out my name to read. So, I went to a speech therapist for help who said something very profound to me: “Just pretend you are Oprah”. Basically, act confident and cool, even though it might feel like your stomach is filled with butterflies. Puking butterflies.

I am a firm believer in the fake. Not fake goods, but fake confidence. And lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about faking it. Particularly, faking it ‘till you make it. (Note to my boss: this, of course, only applies to my personal life.)

When we think about faking we automatically think about being two-faced and lying to others, right? But this is not necessarily true.

I have previously explored the joys of being someone else (if only for a day). According to my god of fashion wisdom, Leandra Medine of ManRepeller, style and confidence intersect. Being someone else (an heiress to a Swiss chocolate fortune, the hostess who gets to tell Naomi Campbell the restaurant is fully booked, a Tuscan-village fruit seller or a badass Wall Street banker), can be incredibly therapeutic. The way you dress can greatly determine your level of confidence on any given day.

“Confidence is still difficult to reconcile — some of us have it, some of us don’t — but in my experience, if you fake it for long enough, it tends to come true. That’s kind of the thing, right? No external variable, not a marriage, not a new handbag, not even really a job promotion, will meaningfully affect whether or not you experience confidence because that shit comes from a lot of tender, internal monologuing. But clothing does have a cool transformative quality and it can serve as an open window that initiates the flood gates,” says Leandra Medine.

Use your armour and fake it until sooner or later you trick yourself into believing you are confident. Fashion is kind of the fast food version of confidence.

Of course, your internal monologue is the one you ultimately want to be targeting. And I have actually found that being able to be at ease when you are alone is crucial. This has been my biggest confidence builder – especially in the last few years of my life.  When you feel content being alone, be it strutting down the road in Swiss chocolate fortune heiress mode, or walking into a room where you know no one with the confidence of a ruthless Wall Street banker (god help them all), fashion elevates.

Sooner or later you become so convinced that even your internal monologue is saying: “bitch, please” to any and everyone who dares to mess with you.

- Woman24


Read News24’s Comments Policy

Comment on this story
Add your comment
Comment 0 characters remaining

Read more from our Users

Nigeria @ 56: Words to my green f...

A leader’s job is not to dictate, but rather to be respected, admired and be a trustee, of the land we love, with so much potential, a land which should be freer than free. Its still a long way to fufilling our destiny! Read more...

Submitted by
Isaac Asabor263
Recession: An opportunity for Nig...

The recession should be seen as an opportunity for the country’s promotion as long as we all collectively conduct ourselves in a patriotic manner, writes Isaac Asabor.  Read more...

Submitted by
Black and White

We want to imitate the whites in everything because we are ignorant of our inherent originality and content. We spend all our Naira to acquire his inventions because we so oblivious of our natural endowments that we allow him have it for free. Read more...

Submitted by
Nate Nat
Adamawa State University Mubi: A ...

ADSU integrity forum has accused the Sunday Joshua Wugira, a lawyer, of adopting unorthodox tactics by abusing his privilege by attacking the integrity of ADSU Vice Chancellor Dr. Moses Zira Zaruwa, writes a News24 reader. Read more...

Submitted by
Abdulsalam Jubril
My Country Nigeria (Part One)

Poetry by Abdulsalam Jubril.

Submitted by
Abdulsalam Jubril
Recession, dearth in leadership a...

Every leader has the opportunity to become great and making himself immortal in the lives and hearts of people for generations to come. Will Mr. President seize this opportunity?, questions Abdulsalam Jubril. Read more...