Modern dating mainly consists of texting, we take a look at
the pron's and con's of online dating.
Dating these days is a pretty tricky affair, that requires a
cool head and iron self-control.
Neither of which have ever been my strengths. As a highly strung and sometimes clingy
female (if I can admit it, so can you), social media has become my greatest
Especially when there is a cute guy with excellent grammar
in the picture.
It all starts innocently enough, with a punchy Facebook
message or well placed Whatsapp emoji. But it doesn’t take long before I am a
hot mess, compulsively checking my phone and firing off texts at all hours.
Words like self-control, dignity and “playing hard to get”
simply evaporate when last night’s date sends me a flirty text.
As harmless as texting may seem, I’d posit that it can be
dangerous and maybe even harmful (Recent experience makes me something of an
Aside from the obvious distraction from work and life, online
apps expose you to unscrupulous men who use their social media media savvy to
control, manipulate and charm you.
Also read: Why do men choose second wives?
It also makes it extremely hard to end things when your love
interest is merely a finger tap away.
This was illustrated most painfully by Mike, a type who
you’ve probably encountered on the single scene. Gorgeous, funny and a newly
minted PhD, he had me from the first date.
So promising was this new potential and so despondent had I
become about my romantic prospects, that I disregarded the red flags which
So what if he called his ex-girlfriend crazy or monologued
about himself for three full hours on our first date. Who cared if he had been
seeing a girl who had a boyfriend - boasting about the oh-so amazing sex and her
enduring fondness for him.
Or that he attempted to kiss me after his hideous
confession. I was lonely - tired of feeling alone and impatient with being
perpetually single. We had great chemistry too, which is a common side effect
of very narcissistic men.
So I kept him around over text, because letting go is too
hard and I am a shameless sucker for male attention. Flattering, flirting and
promising the world, our messages revolved around getting me to another date.
But then, something shifted.
Instead of ending things, he cancelled the eventual date
with a classic excuse about his sick grandmother (It still happens).
Which should be the end of the story. But because of the
accessibility granted by technology, he reappeared in my inbox a week later.
The games were pretty predictable – texting when I was busy and losing interest
when I was chatty.
Disappearing for days and offering heartfelt apologies for
hurting me after. Begging for dates but becoming suspiciously unavailable when
I was free.
Despite the inevitable end, I stayed because the feeling of
having a boyfriend was nice and because I got addicted to the adrenalin and the
hope for a happy ending triggered by each message. Even if it was just a
Whatsapp game to him.
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